do you ever get that feeling you are gunna die soon?
i have that feeling right now and i want to call everyone and tell them everything i feel. but that could come back and bite me in the ass if i don't die. so i'm just gunna call laken then one person that already knows everything. so i dont have to confess anything. just to tell her i love her. but what if i do die? then nobody will know. i think i'm gunna go write everything down, letters for everyone. everyone's gunna think i'm crazy for this entry.

maybe my problem is that i just do NOT care. i don't care what he thinks or what you think or what they think. i'm begining to realize maybe it's not such a good thing, but i can't make myself care about what people think of me if they just don't really matter. and when i say matter i mean like really matter (like maybe a handful of people), that matter to me and i matter to them. the rest of you are just gossiping and pretending like you care. i want to care a little more but not as much as some people i know. i know they can't help it but AHHH  it makes me want to scream to see some people get so sad after they chose to do something and people find out. just don't do it if you care. don't hide it. i'm not saying go tell everyone because that is absolutly unnessesary (i can't spell) but i mean if you're caught, you're caught. some of this that i'm writing makes me feel like a big fat hypocrit because i haven't always been open and told the truth and totally not cared what people think. but lately i'm just losing all desire to impress anyone. this sounds stupid and emo but i just don't give a fuck. this whole outlook on life will probably bite me in the ass soon. you all can laugh. i'll probably laugh too. but i mean PEOPLE LIVE! please do it for yourselves. if you want to say something say it! if you want to do something do it (if it's moral of course)! and if you don't want alot of people to know what you do (you probably shouldn't be doing it). no one will ever probably read this. but i really don't care because i got shit out and that's what i needed to do.

i got in a 5 car wreck today during our senior caravan....yippeee

GO EAGLE BASEBALL!

must be the wasobi... the god damn wasobi.

no one writes on this thing anymore!

facebook has taken over.... and i crossed to the dark side. i still feel bad about it.

i look like a tomato. i'm so red, but i'm hoping i will get a tan out of this pain.

i went golfing today with casey steve and paul. yea i kicked ass. actually i suck. but i'm getting lessons this summer yehoooo.

nachotiches this weekend.... all weekend. me laur nat and allyce.    : )

crushes are stupid.

this is for all of you ROSEANNE haters.... suck it.

sorry if i have been mean to you lately. seriously i'm gunna try to stop. but some of you deserved it. and i'm not sorry.

i can't stop having these stupid dreams. and all they do is make me wake up crying. i hate to go to sleep now days. leave me alone dream fairy. let me be.

its weird to find out things after it's been over for so long. i knew it was true. i'm not even going to ask you about it. now i know for sure you really aren't worth it.  and soooo strange who i heard it from.... you are just gunna do it over and over again

haha can't wait.

bye everyone